On Purpose
by threerainydays
Summary: Vaike wasn't sure when he started forgetting his axe on purpose, but he knew it had something to do with the studious mage who always remembered to bring it for him. Miriel/Vaike. Oneshot.


_Shortly after publishing Casual Observations, I was struck by the urge to write more of Miriel and Vaike. I'm pleased with how this oneshot turned out, and I hope you enjoy reading more about the silliness these two get themselves into. Dedicated to the lovely GreenEmeraldGirlxoxo, who shares my love for this stupid couple._

* * *

 **On Purpose**

Chrom sucked in a sharp breath as he surveyed the scene below. He gripped the hilt of Falchion a little tighter, as if seeking comfort from the familiar blade. "Gods, have the Risen spread this far already?"

Robin's grip on her own weapon was firm, her Thunder tome tucked securely beneath her arm. "Don't worry, Chrom," she said. She gave him a small smile. "I've got a plan."

"Then I'll be counting on you to lead us into battle," he said. Turning to the rest of the Shepherds, he said, "Everyone, do as Robin instructs. If we're all ready, then –"

"Wait a minute, has anyone seen my axe?"

Chrom slapped a hand to his forehead. "You have got to be kidding me."

"No, I'm serious!" A warrior said as he pushed his way to the front. He looked around frantically, searching for his missing weapon. "Anyone got a spare they can lend the Vaike?"

Robin could see Chrom's eye twitch in irritation. Before he could reprimand Vaike further, Robin put a hand on Chrom's shoulder. Raising her voice, she spoke over the crowd. "Vaike, stay at the back behind the mages. Those on mounts, proceed to the front!"

"Wha? But you need Teach out there!" He tried to protest.

No one listened. Robin continued to direct the others to their positions, and Vaike had no choice but to move reluctantly to the end of the line. He sat down, picking at the grass as he sulked, wishing he was out there in the field with everyone else. He'd been raring to go, all set and waiting for action. And it wasn't like he'd forgotten his axe – he just forgot to remember it. He'd only put it down for a second, and then the next thing he knew it was gone.

He shook his head to clear his thoughts. "Ah, whatever," he mumbled. "So I messed up a little. Next time I'll be so awesome Chrom'll regret benching the Vaike."

He lay back on the grass, frowning as he watched the battle from a safe distance, unaware that someone was approaching him until they stepped in front to block his view.

"Hey, d'ya mind?" He said, squinting against the sunlight to look up at whoever it was. "You're in the way."

"My apologies," the person said. "It was not my intent to obscure your line of vision."

Vaike noticed that whoever it was still hadn't moved, despite having apologized. He stood up in irritation, trying to think of a good comeback. "Yeah, well, ya did," he said lamely. "So, uh, move out o' the way."

He stood slightly above the person, still squinting a little as he took in their appearance. It was a woman, he realized. A woman wearing black robes and an oversized hat. Her dark red hair was cut bluntly at the ends, her eyes narrowed behind thin glasses. She pushed the frames up a fraction of an inch, fingers balanced delicately at the corner. He was a little unnerved by the way she looked at him, as if he were an amusing puzzle she was trying to solve. Vaike decided after two seconds of this treatment that he didn't like being stared at by this woman.

"Have you deliberated entreating courteously?" She asked, still staring at him unflinchingly.

Vaike blinked. "Wha? Lady, I ain't got a clue what ya just said." He was starting to think that arguing with her wasn't worth the time it would take for him to just move around her. "So look, you like this viewing spot so much, keep it. I really don't want it anymore anyway."

"You misunderstand," she said. "I merely came to deliver this."

"Yeah, well unless it's my axe I don't really – MY AXE!"

He somehow hadn't noticed the rather large weapon she'd been carrying until she held it out to him in plain sight. Vaike reached out to take it, laughing as he held it up in both his hands reverently, turning it over to make sure it was really his. "I don't believe it," he said. "Where'd you find it? Never mind, that ain't important. Hey, what's your name?"

"Miriel," she said. He noticed she said this while adjusting her glasses unnecessarily again.

"Miriel," he repeated. The name didn't mean anything to him, but now that he looked at her more closely, he did vaguely recall seeing her around the barracks. "You the one that's always got your nose in a book? Anyway, thanks for this." He grinned, hefting his axe over his shoulder. "Now I can finally get in on the action."

"Allow me to accompany you," she said swiftly, stepping in front of him again before he could charge off. "To preclude any auxiliary mishaps, our tactician instructed to have you escorted to the skirmish should you recover your axe."

Vaike racked his brain to try and figure out her meaning. "Er… escort. Right. I think I learned that word before. Never could remember how to spell it. You takin' me to one o' them fancy parties and what not?"

"Time is of the essence," she went on as if she hadn't heard him (and maybe she hadn't, which considering her behavior thus far wouldn't surprise him). She gripped his free arm and began pulling him forward. "The contemporaneous state of affairs demands our immediate attention, and we can't afford to delay any longer."

"Wait a minute," he said, easily resisting her attempts to drag him along. " _I'm_ going. You ain't got a weapon, lady, and war ain't no picnic."

She held up a red tome he also hadn't noticed earlier, and as understanding dawned on his face, the corners of her lips turned up into an almost imperceptible smile. He found himself grinning too, realizing he didn't need to worry about her as much as he'd thought.

"Nice," he said appreciatively. "The Vaike doesn't usually make offers like this, but he thinks he wants you fighting next to him out there."

"Indeed," she said. "Our combined abilities should grant us an advantage. I trust you won't obscure _my_ line of vision in combat."

Vaike found himself grinning a little. Seemed like there was more to Miriel than he first thought. "Less talking, more fighting!"

And with that, he launched himself into the fray. Axe in hand, he laughed and charged at the oncoming Risen.

Chrom was mildly surprised to see Vaike bursting onto the scene, although he didn't complain once it was clear that Vaike was properly armed this time. Ignoring the blue-haired prince, Vaike directed all his attention to the battle before him.

Run, swing, dodge, roll. Rinse and repeat. Easy stuff. This, he could handle.

He felt a sudden heat as a fireball rushed past him, instantly igniting its target. Turning around sharply, he identified the source as none other than Miriel. She held open a tome in one hand, her other arm outstretched towards the enemy.

It might have just been the adrenaline or a heat of the moment delusion, but Vaike thought Miriel looked especially attractive in battle, calmly casting spell after spell at the enemy. As their undead corpses burned from the fire magic, the barest hint of a smirk crept on to her face as she adjusted her glasses with satisfaction.

…Whoa. That was hot (no pun intended).

Maybe there was something to be said for all that book reading and number calculating she was always doing. Her accuracy was incredible compared to his swing-until-it-hits strategy.

"You're amazin', Miriel," he called just as he finished off a myrmidon.

"Mind yourself," she said. "Your choice of weapon puts you at a disadvantage against the swordmasters."

"Yeah, yeah," he said with a grin, changing course for the lance-wielding cavaliers instead. Vaike was thinking maybe it was time to follow Miriel's example and conduct an experiment of his own.

* * *

When he arrived at the next battle, Vaike made a big show of forgetting his axe. Chrom looked irritated and ordered him to stay at the back again. Robin raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

He went where Robin directed him, whistling to himself as he waited for further instructions. As time passed, a part of him started to doubt if this was such a good idea. He was pinning all his hopes on Miriel following through here, and if she didn't he'd actually end up sitting out the battle.

Before he could dwell on that thought for too long, he heard someone calling out to him.

"Hold a moment!"

He spun around, trying not to look too excited. "Heya, Miriel. You call for Teach?"

"Indeed," she said. "I've procured your armament. It would be most imprudent to send you into combat incapable of properly engaging the adversary."

"My axe!" He said, trying to sound surprised. He couldn't suppress the grin that spread across his face as he realized his experiment had been a success. Good thing too, otherwise he really would have been useless and he was pretty sure Chrom wouldn't appreciate that. Teach had to set a good example out there, after all.

"Imbecile," she said in response. "This is the second time you've neglected to transport your weapon. Please refrain from making this a habit."

As soon as she said that, an idea struck him like one of Robin's lightning bolts. Unfortunately for Miriel (and everyone else in the Shepherds), Vaike was planning on doing everything in his power to always forget his axe from now on.

* * *

In the battles that followed, Vaike was nothing if not consistent. It became a pattern of sorts that went something like this: he would show up late and empty-handed to battle, proclaim loudly that he'd forgotten his axe, and proceed to shuffle his way to the back. Halfway there, Miriel would show up, hand him his axe with a few stern words of disapprobation, and then he would skip off happily to take his place next to her on the field.

This sequence of events repeated itself a few times, until eventually the other Shepherds came to anticipate the routine. They'd part in half down the middle to create a path for Vaike to exit through so smoothly Chrom started to wonder if they'd choreographed it. Eventually Chrom told Vaike to just stay near the front since Miriel would show up sooner or later and there wasn't any point in Vaike interrupting the formation of the others if he was just going to end up coming right back to where he started.

And so he waited, and Miriel brought his axe, day in and day out without fail. Chrom was growing increasingly frustrated every time it happened, until finally he snapped.

"This has gone on long enough," he said, standing up sharply. He'd been in the middle of a war council meeting with Robin, who hardly blinked at his outburst.

Without missing a beat, she said, "Should I call him in?"

"No," Chrom said. "I'll go get him myself."

With that, he got up and left to go find Vaike. Robin hummed to herself and continued to review maps of the terrain while she waited. At least her job was never boring.

* * *

Chrom paced back and forth, a frown on his face. Vaike was seated on the opposite side of the war planning table, feeling very much like a kid caught stealing from the candy jar. Oddly enough, no one ever called Gaius on it anymore, even though it was obviously the sweets-loving thief who was responsible for the boxes of candy that mysteriously went missing from the supply tent. Unfortunately, Vaike had a hunch he wasn't going to be let off quite so easily.

"I've had it," Chrom said, throwing his hands up in exasperation. "This has gone on long enough. I could be sympathetic the first time it happened – we all make mistakes every now and then. But this, this is getting downright ridiculous! It wasn't just one forgetful mistake. No, by now it's been… how many times has it been Robin?"

"Seventeen," Robin said drily. The tactician had taken a chair across from Vaike, content to let Chrom handle the matter first.

"Right, thank you," Chrom nodded. The glare returned to his face as he looked at Vaike. "Seventeen times. Who forgets to bring their weapon to battle _seventeen times_?!"

Vaike cleared his throat awkwardly. "Aw, c'mon, Chrom. You know ol' Teach didn't mean any harm. He's just been a tad bit forgetful lately."

"Didn't mean any harm?" He repeated tersely. "Regardless of your intentions, you've done lots of harm. People could have gotten hurt because of your carelessness!"

"But no one did," Vaike argued. "This ain't worth getting worked up over. The Vaike always got his weapon back, one way or another."

"This is war, Vaike," Chrom said sharply. "You could die out there. I expected even you would understand that."

Vaike looked away, guilt settling in as the weight of Chrom's words hit him. "I-I'm sorry. No, I mean it," he said upon seeing Chrom's skeptical look. "You're right, I've been stupid. It won't happen again."

"What I don't understand is why," Chrom said, a little less angry now that Vaike at least looked repentant. "Come to think of it, this didn't become a problem until recently. I ask as both your captain and as a concerned friend. What's been going on with you?"

Well. After the lecture he'd just been through, Vaike knew now was hardly the time to admit his feelings for Miriel. He almost snorted out loud imagining what Chrom's outraged reaction would be to that explanation. Still, the question stood and Chrom was clearly waiting for some kind of response.

While he knew his commanding captain wouldn't approve of him lying to his face, Vaike decided that sometimes the truth was better left unsaid. Considering the circumstances, he figured Chrom would probably prefer a good sounding excuse to the truth, and made a silent promise to himself that he'd stop pestering the prince to spar with him for the next week.

Now all he had to do was come up with a convincing lie. "Well, uh, you see I've been uh… the Vaike has been –"

Vaike was spared from what was turning out to be a poor explanation by Robin, who chose that moment to stand up. "You've lectured him enough, Chrom. I'll take over from here."

Chrom looked a little surprised, but didn't protest. "You sure, Robin?"

"I trust that Vaike has learned his lesson," she said. "And I think you should go check on Frederick to make sure he doesn't go too overboard training the new recruits. I'm pretty sure they've been running laps for over an hour now."

"I'll put a stop to that," Chrom said. "Honestly, they joined the Shepherds, not the army. Although I guess technically we are fighting a war, so… you know what, that's a good idea. Thanks, Robin."

He slipped out of the tent, and Robin and Vaike sat in silence for a moment. Despite the trouble he was in, Vaike managed a laugh. He relaxed in his chair, folding his hands behind his head. "The Vaike knows you didn't send Chrom away for nothin' there," he said. "Whaddya got to say, Robin?"

"I'll skip the formalities," Robin said with a knowing gleam in her eyes. "I've known about your crush on Miriel since the beginning."

Vaike blushed and tried to cover it with a cough. "Ya have, huh? Figures you ain't our tactician for nothing. So whaddya plan to do 'bout it?"

"As long as you remember your axe from now on, nothing. I figured I'd save you from too much embarrassment back there. Chrom wouldn't understand even if you had told him the truth," she said. With a sigh, she shook her head. "Inspiring leader he may be, but the man's utterly hopeless when it comes to romance."

"Harsh," Vaike said with a grin. "But you're right, o'course. The day Chrom notices Cordelia's got feelings for him, I'll eat my shirt."

"Vaike, you don't own a shirt. At least, not that I've seen anyway," she commented.

"Aw, yeah. Well, you know what I mean," he said, feeling much more cheerful now. Looks like he'd be showing up to challenge Chrom on time as usual tomorrow.

Robin leaned forward in her chair, hands resting on top of the battle maps spread out on the table. "I was willing to let your actions slide for a while, but that ends today. Coming to battle defenseless helps no one," she said sternly. "I trust we won't need to discuss this again?"

"Yes, ma'am," he said, giving her a mock salute. "Seems even Teach could stand to learn a thing or two."

"While we're on the subject, take my advice. You don't need to act like a bumbling idiot in order to get a girl's attention. Keep that in mind the next time you try and talk to Miriel."

"Will do," he said. "Can't say I understand why you're interested in helping me, but I'll take what I can get."

"Let's just say I've got an interest in ensuring the Shepherds stay in good relations with one another," she said cryptically. "And just so you know, it was quite an inconvenience for me to have to reposition our units to cover for you until Miriel could bring your axe," Robin said, already walking out of the tent. "Catch my drift?"

"Yeah, yeah, I owe you, you're the best tactician ever," he said, waving his hand.

"Damn right," she said, the tent flap closing behind her.

* * *

At the next battle, Vaike took extra measures to make sure nothing would go wrong. He retrieved his axe thirty minutes prior to departure and kept a firm grip on it the entire time. When Chrom gave the signal for them to move out, it was still in his hands as he marched forward with the others. He couldn't help but smirk a little at the surprised look on Chrom's face.

"Still had doubts, eh Chrom?" He said cheekily. "Just so you know, the Vaike keeps his promises."

After so many weeks of showing up unprepared, it felt good to be ready for once. If Miriel was surprised by his change in behavior, she didn't show it. But Vaike was determined to start doing things right, and so he approached Miriel once they returned to camp.

"Hey, Miriel? Mind takin' a walk? There's uh… something I wanna say."

She studied him closely. "Something you cannot elucidate here?"

"No. Er, yes. Look, what I mean is, it's kinda important that it's just you and me," he said, hoping she'd get it before he embarrassed himself any more.

"Very well," she said, to his relief.

They walked to the edge of camp, a good distance away from the others. Vaike cleared his throat nervously as he rubbed the back of his neck. "Alright, you got this," he mumbled to himself. "Ain't nothing the Vaike can't do."

Clearing his throat again, he said, "I've got a confession to make."

"Fascinating," she said. "I believe I also have a confession."

"Hold that thought for a moment," he said. "See, the thing is… I wasn't forgetting my axe all the time for nothing. I did it 'cause I wanted to get your attention, because I… I like ya, Miriel."

She didn't respond immediately, and only continued to stare at him coolly. Vaike backtracked. "Er, ya do understand what I mean, right? I don't like ya as a friend. I mean, I do, but I also like ya as more than a friend. Is this makin' any sense?"

"Yes," she said. "You mean to say that you are sexually attracted to me, correct?"

He blushed bright red. "Well, you ain't wrong, but… heh, you don't mince words, do ya? And, well, it's never boring when you're around and I thought maybe you might feel the same about me?"

Her lips tilted upwards in a smile, and Vaike couldn't help but think that a smile suited her much better than her usual stone-faced expression. "I admit I do find you a fascinating subject for observation. And also… yes. I believe I reciprocate your feelings of affection."

Vaike fist-pumped the air in triumph. "Aw yeah! So then we dig each other, right?"

"It would seem so," she said with a nod. "Although there is something you should know first."

"Whazzat?" Vaike said, still reveling in the fact that Miriel liked him too and that he hadn't just made a fool of himself. "You say somethin' Miriel?"

"If you recall, several weeks ago you misplaced your weapon for the first time. I confess that it was not you who misplaced it that day," she said. "In fact, I hid it from you… on purpose."

"Well, o' course ya did, otherwise how could I have – wait, WHAT!" Vaike was a bit slow to process what she said, but once his brain caught up with his ears, he stopped short. "Ya mean it wasn't a mistake that I couldn't find my axe that day?"

She pushed up her glasses, and nodded minutely. "Indeed. You put it down for a brief moment, and that was when I appropriated it."

"B-but why?" He spluttered, still trying to make sense of everything.

He was surprised to see an all-too familiar smirk return to her face. "Surely you understand my intentions better than anyone, Vaike. I did it to get your attention. And it seems my experiment was a success."

Vaike stood there, stunned for a moment. Then he grinned. Looks like being a bumbling idiot had gotten Miriel's attention after all.

* * *

 _My poll is still ongoing: Which critical hit lines from Fire Emblem: Awakening are your favorites? I plan to close the poll and post the results within the next few weeks, so please take a moment and place your vote before then!_

 _As always, thanks for reading!_


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